Sunday, July 27, 2008

A Clear Conscience

A woman just called in to my work with the following story:

After asking to speak with the Manager on Duty, "Jennifer" as I shall call her here, explained the deeply disconcerting reason why she could absolutely not come in to work today.

Apparently, a bottle of Clear Eyes Solution opened up in her purse, spilling all over the interior of the bag. In the process of making everything else wet in the bag, the liquid also soaked a half-eaten cookie that was with all the other items one carries in a purse.

Jennifer said that she later ate the remainder of the cookie and is now too sick to come in for her scheduled shift.

Why would one have a half-eaten cookie just lying about the bag in the first place and more importantly why, oh, why would you eat anything that has taken a dip in eye drop solution?

I suppose she should at least be given props for creativity.

UPDATE: “Did you hear what happened to me?!” Jennifer asked me the following day. “Yes…well, I think so,” I replied still severely questioning the veracity of this incident. Still, proceeded to ask her why she ate the clear-eyes-cookie-surprise. “I just ate it. I didn’t think it would be bad,” she said. Okay. After speaking with Poison Control last night, Jennifer today informed me that apparently Clear Eyes is “better” for you than Visine-though both can eat your stomach from the inside. Nice.

3 comments:

Kelli said...

Oh my god you have got to be kidding me.

Ian K. said...

Sadly, I kid not.

Bryson said...

She is such a liar. Damn that Jennifer!